Since it doesn't show up in the "posted by" section of my posts because of my blue hot dog/pink taco customization, I wanted to call attention to the fact that my comments will now appear with my real name (and nickname), Jeremy "King Skidz" Gibbens so you don't wonder, "Who the fuck is that?" I've never really hidden my real name; you can find it in the credits of some of my videos and links to my blog. I just felt weird about the whole pseudonym thing. Plus I own a lot of guns, so I'm not worried. Guns don't kill people; I do. Usually with suffocation though. With a Fruit Roll-Up. And nasty gas. Horrid, horrid gas. Quite stinky. Yep... Sure thing... What's that? We have another 60 seconds? Um... how about a recap of the weather, Sven? Oh, he left. Wanna see a magic trick?

If you're reading this via RSS, swing by and check out the new design. This the most comprehensive redesign I've done on the blog to date, and I welcome your feedback, good or bad. Love it? Hate it? Something's broken or funky (bad links, javascript errors, ovary pain, etc)? Comment here or drop me an email, and I'll do my best to address it or tell you why you're wrong.

By the way, the Twitter feed is an extension of the blog module provided by Twitter. Instead of showing your entire timeline of you and everyone you follow or only showing you, you can select any number of specific users to include in the feed. Right now it is sorted by user, not chronologically, but I plan on fixing that this weekend. I'll make it available for anyone who wants to use it once I get the kinks worked out and make it a little more user friendly.

Loving you like winter marmots,

-Jeremy

A preview of why I haven't been very posty the last couple days.

You may have already noticed the mysterious appearance of pink tacos and blue hot dogs on the posts. If you haven't already figured it out, pink tacos represent the feminine, spicy meat-filled side of Ang, while the blue hot dog represents the nitrate-filled, elongated virility of me. It's a quick and easy way for you quickly determine who wrote what without scrolling down to the bottom of the post and actually reading. Because we wouldn't want you to furrow your brow so hard you squeeze out a hemorrhoid.

Or is she actually the sheriff? Miss Ang has expressed a desire for an outlet to express her bawdier thoughts outside of the moral restrictions of her own blog and her much higher profile website. There will be no promises that she will post here with any frequency (or at all), but she can raunch it up here anytime she wants. Could this be a new dawn in the era of afterglide? Don't fuck it up, Angie (no pressure, muffin tits!).

You probably already noticed the new banner. I grew tired of the icy blue motif pretty quickly. Spring is here, bitches! This shit should be piping hot! So in honor of springtime and young men's thoughts turning to lithe, prancing fillies, I have made a banner worthy of the depravity that is afterglide. You may recognize this as a modified version of the sign on Bourbon St in New Orleans outside of the Unisexx Club that proclaims World Famous Love Acts! I'm digging the banner if I do say so myself, but can't help feeling the rest of my template is a little lackluster now. I'm open to suggestions.


"Hey, I wonder what's in the Unisexxx Club. I sure hope it's world famous love acts!"When my then-girlfriend and I were in New Orleans over Halloween weekend in 2004, she remarked that she wanted to go into one of the strip clubs in the French Quarter. Frankly, I wasn't in the mood and preferred continuing to people watch and drink in the street, despite the constant risk of seeing 70 year old grannies flash their saggy leather teat bags. But I looked up, spotted the Unisexxx Club sign, and before I could even raise my pointing finger to a 15 degree angle, she scrunched up her nose and said, "No, that place looks GROSS, Jeremy!" I couldn't help but laugh, because that's exactly the reaction I was going for and exactly the reaction I knew I'd get.

My blog is now icy like your heart, bitch who left me to join a convent. Bet those priests don't do that thing I did with my tongue and the Silly Putty egg.

You bitched. I listened. I'm going to do a trial run at turning off comment moderation. If anonymous trolls and/or spammers come out of the woodwork, I'll probably just try turning off anonymous commenting before I go back to turning moderation on. I hope you know that I do this because I love you like breakfast sausage and the reverse cowgirl.

Thanks to a new feature of blogspot, you may notice that the address shown in your browser is now www.afterglide.com. You've always been able to get here using that address, but now it doesn't just forward to blogspot, it actually is the address of my blog. Confused? I don't care. It's awesome. No need to worry about your old bookmarks and links to afterglide.blogspot.com. They will continue to forward to the new address indefinitely. Long live afterglide.com and banging your hot mom!

I've got my blog template a little closer to where it was, including the watermark background image. Unfortunately I realized that a consequence of my fucking around adding labels to all 400+ archived posts (did I mention that I put labels on over FOUR HUNDRED posts?) is that my RSS feed is a tad screwy. It's currently showing extremely old posts instead of the most recent ones. I think I can fix that though. Now I just need to see about getting the drop cap/drop letter/whatever the fudgecicle you call it. You know, where the first letter of the paragraph looked like this:


Maybe I should change the drop letter/cap thingies so they're made out of cartoon penises all bent into various letter shapes like clown balloons.

I switched my blog over to the new version of blogger last night and have switched over to a new blogger beta template. I'll be working bringing back the old colors, formatting, etc into the new template and adding tags to all of the past posts tonight, so bear with me while things look a little plain jane for a few more hours.

UPDATE: You can do some really cool stuff with the new blogger beta templates, but I'm a little overwhelmed at the prospect of getting things like they were before. Editing your template is quite different, and there are some gee whiz things a web/programmer geek like me can do, so I'm pondering the possibilities. For now, the colors, links on the right, and logos are back. I'll probably end up working on it more over the weekend.

UPDATE 2: I obsessively went through and labeled/categorized all 400+(!!!) archived posts last night. I also changed the list of links called "selections from the archive" to be based on a live feed of the new category "Jeremy's Favorites". This will make it much easier to maintain. I'll work more on the template layout/colors this weekend.

Instead of enjoying our gorgeous evening, my lame ass just spent a few hours working on my blog template. You'll notice that the posting text and title colors have changed to match the afterglide logo. I've also redone the logo to brighten it up and have added a faint watermark-like background image that runs along the right side (it's basically a very large afterglide logo rotated 90 degrees clockwise).

The biggest change, one that I'm not sure I'm completely sold on yet, is that the first letter of each posting is now shown as a letter matching the afterglide logo font (what would you call this--a drop letter?). This is done with some rather nifty javascript I wrote (if I do say so myself) and the painstaking process of creating an individual image file for each letter of the alphabet. I've tested it in Internet Explorer 6 and Firefox 1.5. If you are getting error messages, something looks screwy, or you plain don't like it, feel free to drop me an email or comment.

Mmmm hmmmm. Much better than the original glowing electro roller rink thing I had going before. The GIMP rocks. Like electric sex in the living room window.

Howdy, Chesters and Chesteresses. This is the first official posting at afterglide's new home. I've been busy copying all of the old postings over here. I think I've got all of them, and hopefully the date and timestamps on them aren't too out of wack.

Why move it over here? Two words: MySpace blows. I've had an account here on blogspot since 2001, but ended up only posting about 3 dick-blisteringly mundane entries about boring day to day shit. Yeah, you'll still get that going forward but just not as dick-blisteringly so. It was really in July of 2005 after I joined MySpace that I started blogging with any frequency. Unfortunately, I soon found that MySpace is a two-fisted clusterfuck of random error messages, napworthy response times, and complete system outages. Interesting since I attended their keynote presentation at a conference in Bethesda, MD last summer where they touted their uptime and code quality. Tout in one hand, shit in the other...

So blog on, you blogging cocksnoggers. Blog on.

Note from Jeremy: Prior to January 2, 2006, this blog was hosted at MySpace.com

I can't say it was exactly a hard decision to make, but I've decided to move my blog wholesale over to a different site devoted specifically to blogging. I'm not going to delete anything I already have here on MySpace, but I am in the middle of copying all of my old postings over to the new site so I won't have stuff spread out all over the place.

The plan is to point afterglide.com to the new site when I'm done. I'll post an announcement here when it's ready.

So you may notice the new logo and color scheme. Pardon my dust while I screw around trying to get the colors relatively decent. It will take a day or two to go through, but I'm pointing my new domain afterglide.com to this site. If you recall, I had previously been using policenation.com. I'll keep pointing that domain here, but I felt it was a little too harsh sounding for the goofy-ass nature of my typical rantings. Afterglide.com is a bit more mellow sounding. What does it mean? Eh...nothing really. Just sounded cool. Like a combo of afterglow and astroglide (theoretically the astroglide would come first, then the afterglow, right?) *grin*