Friday, March 30, 2007
Poon Tang Cruiser
Aw yeah, taintlickahs! Check out my sweet ass ride from Enterprise Rental. I took my car in for its 60k service today, and they realized they were out of loaners. So instead of tooling around in a nice Acura TL or similar luxury ride, I got the PT Cruiser from Enterprise Rental down the the road (on the dealership's dime). It handles like a soapbox racer and does 0 to 60 in 20 minutes. Try not to cream your squirrel covers, ladies. I know firsthand how difficult it is. I've gotten laid like 5 times just since I picked this bad boy up. And I lost count of the road head.
Coooool. It's like you're an old man from the future!
AC, I know. My balls even feel older. I'm still waiting for all of the kids in soccer uniforms to come tumbling out of it, followed by babies and grocery bags.
BTW, what happened to your old username?? The J... one (not saying it in case you're trying to be anonymous).
My sister had one of those in purple and when her husband's car broke down, she gave him the purple PT Cruiser and she got the sleek, silver Nissan 350Z. The (ex)husband was a big former frat jock type guy so it was hilarious to see him driving that hideous flamer car around.
I think he got propositioned by men a lot in that car, too. Is that what you were talking about when you said you got laid 5 times?
Actually it was a lot of older ladies wearing Mom Jeans.
It was right after they introduced Mom Jeans that they developed the car with the functional vagina built into the back...
Mmmm! I wish the PT had a 'gina!
Jeremy, what does afterglide mean?
With this rain I hope you used your rental car to it's fullest potential: the redline neutral drop. It is sure to impress a lot of kids when a PT Cruiser rolls tires across the parking lot. Better if you had BUKAKKE plates tho.
Hedy, afterglide is just a nonsense word. I thought of it before I started blogging and ended up realizing it was perfect given the crap I was writing about. :-)
Aaron, I'd be lucky if I could get that thing to peel over frozen banana peels on a skating rink. Have you ever put way too much shit in your shopping cart at Home Depot or Cub and could barely push or turn it? That's what driving a PT Cruiser feels like.
Hmmm...do I believe you or not? I have this strong feeling that it's some kind of weird sexual reference. You are disappointing me here. Quick! Make something up!
Uhhh... Ummmm... It's when you finish the show with shooting your wad on a chick's stomach and rubbing your wilting erection in it. Yeah! Yeah, that's it!
I wouldn't recommend getting too carried away. Many (most?) rentals spy on you now.
I thought it was just lube.