I dug up a few photos from the poop crayon archive.
The first batch of poop crayons from 1995 proved disasterous, as the processing left a thick residue of highly toxic chemicals on the crayon surface. We didn't stop to think that kids are stupid and put things in their mouths. The result--a lot of dead babies and proof that Darwinism exists.
The poop crayon plant experienced its first true industrial accident in 2000 when a rotund child fell into the processing vat during a public tour. He died after aspirating undigested creamed corn, chunks of bell pepper, and about four quarts of Legos (the raw material shipment came from a daycare). In order to avoid a costly legal battle with his surviving family, we paid to have them murdered.
By 2005, advances in microprocessors and other technology allowed us to shrink the refining equipment down to portable table top units. Here we encourage school children to make their own crayons. We're not sure how the kitten got in there. But not to worry! It was processed into a fine pulp and mixed into several dozen reddish brown crayons.
Poopa Loopas make our factory go.
The first batch of poop crayons from 1995 proved disasterous, as the processing left a thick residue of highly toxic chemicals on the crayon surface. We didn't stop to think that kids are stupid and put things in their mouths. The result--a lot of dead babies and proof that Darwinism exists.
The poop crayon plant experienced its first true industrial accident in 2000 when a rotund child fell into the processing vat during a public tour. He died after aspirating undigested creamed corn, chunks of bell pepper, and about four quarts of Legos (the raw material shipment came from a daycare). In order to avoid a costly legal battle with his surviving family, we paid to have them murdered.
By 2005, advances in microprocessors and other technology allowed us to shrink the refining equipment down to portable table top units. Here we encourage school children to make their own crayons. We're not sure how the kitten got in there. But not to worry! It was processed into a fine pulp and mixed into several dozen reddish brown crayons.
Poopa Loopas make our factory go.
3 comments (leave yours):
Your blog fucking rocks! It's hilarious, read all your posts.
I'm gonna steal that "Titty Fuck" glitter for my site...
A funny thing about those chocolate fountains. To me they look like used butt plugs.
Thanks, Angela! By all means, use the glittery Titty Fuck (aka glittyfuck). May I also suggest "Assgasm" or "Blumpkin"? Yes I may.
M, I've never seen a butt plug with a kitty drowning in its dripping juices. Then again, I've never seen a butt plug in real life (not counting those still in packaging in Sex World or the like).
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